Last year, January 27, 2011. The ducks and geese were keeping one section of the pond clear, and the snow was piled 2 feet high.

This year, January 16, 2012. Our pond only froze completely within the last week or so (last year it was frozen by mid-December) and there’s not a bit of snow to be seen.

And because the kids got new ice skates from their grand parents for Christmas, we went out to test the skates on the ice today at lunchtime.

*I wrote this post on January 16th.  Wouldn’t you know it, it ended up snowing overnight into the 17th.  It’s not all that impressive, just a couple slushy inches of snow, but our drought is officially over.

Happy New Year!  The past two weeks have been pretty intense for our family, a fitting end to a very intense year.  All is well, but does anyone else feel like they need a vacation to recover from their vacation?  I have been enjoying reading all of the many posts around the blog-i-verse that are all about recapping 2011 and setting goals for 2012.  As much as I want to do one as well, I just don’t think I have it in me.  So, while I spend the next week cleaning, cooking, and getting our lives back to something resembling normal, please enjoy a big smooch from all of us via Big Momma, one of our two Dexter cows.  When we first got her she was quite to bossy lady, but dare I say that she has begun to mellow just a bit and was so excited to see us back home that all she wanted to do was kiss all over us? Or, maybe I still smell like molasses from the million, billion cookies we have baked recently, your guess is as good as mine

PS-A little package of farm-made soaps and salves to the first commenter to correctly ID the quote that is the title to this post.

We ended up making marshmallow fluff (for use in the chocolate fudge), marshmallows, spicy and candied almonds, coconut bon bons and peanut brittle.  We left out the ribbon candy (a simple hard candy) and chocolate covered cherries.

Marshmallow fluff

We started with the marshmallow fluff (or creme), which we’d need for the chocolate fudge–rather than using store-bought fluff.  We made a double batch, which turned out to be not quite twice the amount we’d need for our quadruple batch of fudge (see below).

Fluff is a lot easier to make than traditional marshmallows because you don’t need to cook anything and it doesn’t take any gelatin.  The basic recipe consists of egg whites, corn syrup, a bit of salt and powdered sugar.

Here’s the marshmallow fluff recipe we used, same as last year.

We used Alton Brown’s marshmallow recipe.  It’s the best we’ve found.

Chocolate Fudge

The main reason we made the marshmallow fluff was to use in the fudge.  We ended up quadrupling the fudge recipe, but even that didn’t use all of the fluff we made.  Oh, well, now we’ve got two jars of fluff in the fridge for fluffernutters.

The quadruple batch was pushing the limits of our pots and pans.  Luckily it all fit and the batch turned out to be the best we’ve ever made.  It was close to 10 pounds of finished fudge.

We used the same recipe for fudge as we did last year, a pretty straightforward cooked budget which has given us excellent results.

Marshmallows

Marshmallows are only a little more difficult than fluff, in that you have to “cook” the syrup first and it also includes gelatin to make the finished product firmer.  We plan to use these as yummy additions to our Holiday hot chocolates.

Spicy and Candied Almonds

Last year our spiced and candied almonds were very popular.  We decided to go larger this year with double batches of each.

Here are the recipes for the spicy almonds and candied almonds, same as last year.

Coconut Bon Bons

My mom loves coconut and these treats are delicious.  Think of it as a Mounds bar, but homemade and without the sodium metabisulfite.  Granted, ours probably aren’t as shelf stable as the Peter Paul/Hershey product.

Here is the recipe for the coconut bon bons.  We do have to say that we think we’ll make some revisions to the recipe in the future: perhaps the addition of coconut extract for extra flavor.  They tend to taste “sweet” and not as coconut-y as we’d like.

Peanut Brittle

If it could be said that we have a tradition, it would be our brittle.  We’ve been making it, with little variation, for many years.  We use a lovely recipe of uncertain provenance that has turned out gorgeous results in our Calphalon stock pot time after time.

The recipe is recorded on pg. 31 of our personal cookbook of collected recipes (begun in 1997), transcribed here (this is the exact wording, I feel obliged not to alter things):

• 3 cups sugar
• 1 cup light corn syrup
• ½ cup water
• Put in covered pot and cook on high heat
• Swirl, do not stir until reaches boil – approx. 5 min
• Bring to 230º F – approx. 2 min
• Add 4½ cups salted roasted peanuts
• Stir with metal spoon
• Cook until 300º F, stirring constantly – approx. 20 min
• 2 cookie sheets w/ sides sprayed w/ pam
• Stir in 4 tbsp butter, 2 tsp vanilla, 2 tsp baking soda
• Spread onto sheets, spread thin, allow to harden & crack

We have been busy making all manner of holiday decorations, some for the tree and others for the home.  I think we will try to wrap up our decorating projects at the end of next week so that we can switch gears and focus on edible treats.  Last year, we made quite a large number of culinary confections.

So far, we have made a tree skirt, a bunting, a table runner, and some ornaments.  We are adding that to the ornaments and napkins we made last year.  I hope to work on a wreath or two with the kids and also maybe make some ornaments to give as gifts as well as another bunting or two.  I also have a quick panel quilt that I need to get batting for and then quilt together.  My to-do list is long, and I know I won’t get to everything, but I will try.

If I have one wish for Christmas, it is to create wonderful memories for my children so that they will always hold this time of year as sacred and loving in their hearts.  This does not mean having the perfect tree, or the most expensive gifts, far from it.  It means creating loving traditions that are filled with joy and creativity.  It means getting to see the people we love the most.  It means surrounding ourselves with handmade objects.  It means filling our time with Christmas carols and cookies and chocolates.  It means indulging, but not in the overly commercialized Western fashion, but in goodness and faith.  It means letting go and living in the moment.  It means creating cherished memories.

To help facilitate this, last year we started what I hope will be a very long-lived tradition.  Instead of doing the typical Advent calendar, we have wrapped up a book to be opened each night and read all together, based on a suggestion from this blog.  There is a LOT of reading that takes place in our house.  I must spend an hour each day reading to the children, and then Mike does stories with them each night.  But, we don’t often read together, all five of us.  Last year, it sort-of worked out.  We learned from the experience and this year I was able to procure 25+ different holiday books, some directly Christmas themed, some about other holidays or just winter in general.  Thankfully we have the BEST used book store about 40 minutes from us, so buying this many books was not a problem, especially when they were just $1 apiece.  Our children are also one year older and one year wiser, and now that our oldest is reading as well, we hope that these evenings will be very special indeed.  We also ordered a very special treat to go with the books, some Cadbury Roses, coming directly from the UK.  I discovered these while working outside of London and it is now hard to imagine Christmas without a tin of them around.

I hope that you find some magic this month and are able to slow down and live in the moment.  It really is a wondrous time.

Peace.

My sister was able to come and spend the past week with us over  the Thanksgiving break. It was a lovely week and we were able to do some sewing together in addition to all of the cooking and visiting. In fact, this was probably the most relaxed visit we have had in a very, very long time. Just like all families, ours is filled with, “life events”. Some of them happy, others not so much, but it always felt as if our visits were taking place in the shadow of some big thing that was happening and needed most of our focus (I will take the responsibility for some of that, having three little ones over the last seven years).

It is ironic, but in my family, I was not “the sewer”, it was always my sister. In the last year, I think I may have caught up to her, at least in some respects. Luckily, she has the best job ever, working as a Marketing Assistant at Dyno Merchandise, LLC which is the US distributor of Singer sewing notions. There are certainly a number of perks that come with that job, especially if you are someone who loves sewing (or the sister of that person). I have gotten to be involved in product testing, and was even paid to do some pattern writing and sample sewing. She gets exposure to all of the latest gizmos and gadgets set to hit the sewing scene. And, she is privy to the, “donation box”. Basically, some of her major responsibilities include checking products, measuring them, photographing them, etc. Once these packs are opened, they cannot be sold. Into the donation bin they go.

Dyno has several local charities they donate to in Florida. When I told her about the Norwalk Children’s Foundation Peace by Piece group that I met at the Denyse Schmidt sample sale, she knew that she wanted to fill up her second checked bag with as many goodies as she could to bring up here so we could pass them along to them. So, before the chaos of the big turkey day commended, she and I sat down and sewed a couple of pouches together. Mind you, she has never done any patchwork, quilting, or zippers. I like to think that I was a good teacher, but she is a very skilled sewist and has tremendous confidence and took to it all very naturally with little more than a brief demonstration. For those who are interested, she made a 4X5 grid of 2.5″ squares, added a 1.5″ border, then quilted it with 1/4″ lines.  We then followed this tutorial to box it up.  It is a twin to this pouch which I made earlier this fall.  While she sewed, I sorted through the supplies and was able to fill-up five gallon sized zip-lock bags and then some. There was one each of pins, needles, scissors, fabric, thread, and misc supplies. We popped a little card in the box and sent it on its way that very afternoon.

Is there any better feeling than mailing something to someone who needs it?  I left the post office feeling lighter than air and connected to something bigger.

But, our sewing did not end there.  After we finished our nice big Thanksgiving lunch with my parents, we cleared off the table and began to work on a quilt for our younger brother.  He is in the Air Force and stationed in Colorado, so couldn’t join us for the meal.  Thanksgiving is his favorite holiday, and we all missed him tremendously.  So, while I ripped strips of fabric, my sister sewed them into squares, kind of like this quilt, and my mom pressed everything as we went.  The kids played around us and my dad took a nap on the couch.  It was the perfect way to spend the afternoon.  It was so nice for us all to work on a  quilt for my brother.   No pictures, though, I want it to be a surprise  I will be able to finish it in plenty of time for his visit home at Christmas.  We feel very proud of his service and work for our country, and are happy to make him this quilt.   If you don’t have a member of the military in your family, there is a program called the Camo Quilt Project and you can make and donate quilts for our troops.  It is always good to give back during this time of plenty.

So, there were many things to be thankful for this week, and we were able to do lots of giving as well.

AND, since this is such a great project with some yummy fall colors, I am entering one more go-round at Rachel’s Celebrate Color event at Stitched in Color.  This was a collaborative piece, and since my sister does not have a blog or active Flickr account, I will enter it here through my blog.

Connecticut outage map @ 2PM Sunday, October 30, 2011

For the latest reports, visit the CL&P outage page.

We’re ready to hunker down, though as of 10 o’clock Saturday night we still have power (a large swath of Connecticut is in the dark as I write this). We learned from Hurricane Irene (after which we were without power for 7 days) and have our new generator at the ready. We even went out yesterday and got some special activities for the children, including some Hello Kitty puzzles for Miss C and the classic game Operation for J–he loves it).

Waiting for the first flakes.

Outside!

Teamwork building a snowman with help from Zsaka.

Update: Sunday morning around 6AM we finally lost power. Right at the 720,000 outage mark for the state of Connecticut. We learned our lesson during Irene and have a generator running. We enjoyed playing in the snow Sunday morning.

Happy sledding children.

Update #2: Sunday by about 1PM we actually got our power back (we hope it lasts). Still, there are more than 800,000 households without power in Connecticut at the moment. We hope power is restored for everyone as soon as possible, but history proves it could be a while.

After I graduated from college I got a job working as an aide in a school for children with autism spectrum disorders in Surrey, England, which is just outside of London.  My job was to assist the children in whatever way I could during their school day.  In addition to learning basic academics, there was a large focus on learning functional skills, in part to aid with fine motor development.  Enter cross stitch.  I remember being amazed at the beautiful work that these young students were creating and feeling inspired to try it myself.  I popped into a little shop on the high street and got my first bit of fabric and floss and made the little piece below.  I found the work to be tremendously enjoyable and wanted to do more.

My first needle-art piece.

I took every advantage of my time in England to visit many incredible museums.  My favorite by far was the Victoria and Albert.  I fondly remember spending hours there on the weekends most notably in the textile gallery, pulling out glass encased samplers dating back hundreds of years.  I remember wondering about the women (and girls) who had made these incredible works.  What were their lives like?  What were they thinking about while they worked?  How fortunate it was that someone had loved and cherished these works so much that they had been preserved for hundreds of years so that I could now sit before them looking at each stitch. I also remember frequenting antique shops, hoping that maybe I could find one of these lovely samplers to bring home as a souvenir (I quickly learned that they were WELL outside of my budget).

So, in typical fashion, I decided to create my own.  When I came back to the states after living abroad for about six months, I was lucky enough to find an amazing sampler kit by Alyce Schroth at an overstocks store near where my parents were living in Maryland.  I think I paid something really ridiculous (like $5) for this historically accurate kit, complete with linen and naturally dyed silk floss.

I began working with gusto, spending time in the evenings stitching while watching television after work.  A few months after starting this piece, my husband asked me to marry him, and my goal was to be able to finish this sampler in time for our wedding so that I could include the date and make it that much more meaningful.  I had one year, and I thought that should be no problem as I was making excellent progress.

Even though we had a very small wedding (just our immediate family) it was still a good bit of work.  I was also working full time and prepping applications for graduate school.  I was probably 80% finished with the sampler by the time of our wedding.   I set a new goal, which was to finish it in time to move into our first house, which was to be another year in the future.  One year to finish the last 20%, no problem, right?

I think I got another 10% finished that second year, but the process of applying to grad school and buying a new house are even MORE stressful than planning a wedding.  I would pull the piece out whenever I was particularly stressed out or worried and would allow my mind to clear and calm as I worked each stitch. But, mostly it sat there, unfinished.

For the next ten years, I completed less than 1% per year.  I was in grad school, we were restoring a 300 year old house, and we now had cats, dogs, a garden, and eventually babies to keep us busy.  I started knitting and sewing, and with the limited time I had, it seemed more practical to make things like hats, scarves, diapers, and blankets.  I would pull this piece out when I felt the urge.  It felt somehow decadent to spend time making something of a purely decorative nature, and I liked having the connection to women from many generations past.  It also became a kind of “worry stone” and as such began to take on mixed associations for me, both positive and negative.

I am sure that I would have been scolded heavily for how messy the back is way back when.

Almost exactly three years ago, we decided to leave our little one acre oasis in the suburbs and move to a small homestead in the country.  We got busy making a farm from scratch and having our third child.  I added spinning, dyeing, and felting to my list of fiber-related pursuits and began sewing in earnest (as I am sure all of you who read things here regularly are well aware ).  I think there must have been a period of at least a year or more when I didn’t even set eyes on this piece, let alone work on it.

So about a month ago, I was nursing Baby M when I felt something funny in my breast.  It was a small, hard lump, about the size of a pea.  Being a modern woman who tries to live a healthy life, I have been performing regular breast exams for years.  Feeling that little lump was heart stopping.  The rational part of my brain went over the fact that I have zero risk factors (no family history, first pregnancy before 30, nursed all three children, for a total of almost six years and still counting).  I called my midwife and we scheduled an appointment for a few weeks in the future, as she stated it is very normal for women to develop changes in their breasts as they get older and are nursing, and that these changes can be related to their monthly cycle.  She wanted me to complete a cycle and see if this was the case.  Lots of women get lumps in their breasts, for a number of reasons, and this was most likely not a big deal.

A week before my scheduled appointment, the lump was still there.  There was no change, and thankfully no pain, swelling, redness, etc.    If you have never found something odd in your body, I will try to explain what was going through my mind.  While I was able to outwardly appear calm and normal, and even convince myself that everything would be fine, that in all likelihood the WORST case scenario for me would be a double mastectomy, inside I was kind of a mess.  And by “kind of” I mean imagining what it would be like for my children to grow up without me.  It was hard to quiet those voices saying, “What IF.”  Also, I think maybe I have seen the movie Terms of Endearment one too many times.  Don’t watch it unless you don’t mind crying for HOURS and HOURS.

I was organizing things in my craft area as I tend to do when I am anxious and I came across the sampler again. This piece immediately became my little talisman, whenever those voices got loud that week, I would pull it out and stitch.  It required just enough focus that I couldn’t think and stitch at the same time.

I went to my appointment with my midwife and she confirmed what I knew.  There is definitely a lump, and while it is PROBABLY, HOPEFULLY nothing, it shouldn’t be ignored.  Those little berries at the bottom of the sampler, I finished them while I was in her waiting room.  I was scheduled for a bi-lateral ultrasound of both breasts two days after that initial appointment.  I finished the border along the bottom while I sat in the radiology waiting room.  The ultrasound tech was a lovely, jovial woman.  She found the lump instantly and after a thorough scan of both breasts (and my arm pits, lymph nodes?) went to get the radiologist.  She returned with him after just a minute, he conducted his own scan and then decided to send me for a mammogram of both breasts.  I finished half of the border on the left while I sat in another waiting room.  I had my first mammogram one month shy of my 35th birthday.

I was only waiting for a few minutes between having the mammogram completed and going to talk to the radiologist.  Back to my stitches, keeping me calm, grounded, tethered.  Because when you are sitting in a waiting room, trying really hard not to think the worst, it helps to have something lovely to focus on.  Plus (and I know this is irrational, but this is what I thought) I was not going to leave my children orphans with this piece of cross stitch that I had started 13 years ago (with plans to finish for my wedding day, first house, etc.) unfinished.

So, the good news was that my mammograms looked great EXCEPT for that one, pesky lump.  There was nothing in my lymph nodes either, thankfully.  And, while I could wait and see what this little lump does over the next few months, I have chosen to have a core needle biopsy done to rule out anything more serious.  It is PROBABLY nothing.  But if it isn’t I will be taking advantage of everything modern medicine has to offer to make sure that I am around for a good long time.

While I waited for Mike to come and pick me up from the ultrasound/mammogram appointment, I finished all but the last two inches of the border of the left.  I worked outside on a bench in the warm October sunshine.  Two older woman who were also waiting outside came over to chat about my piece.  They both spoke about doing cross stitch in their younger years and were curious about what stitches I was using, the design, etc.  It felt so nice to feel that connection to countless generations of women.  If I had just been sitting there doing nothing or texting or surfing Facebook, would they have come up to me?  I really doubt it.  I am glad that they did.  The smile and kind words of a stranger can be amazingly powerful.

So, after 13 years, this piece is finally finished.  I will be sending it out for custom framing, something I have never before done, but I think will be well worth it.  Every time I look at this piece, I will think of all of the major life events that were incorporated into every stitch.  When I see other samplers, I will always wonder what was happening in the lives of the women who made them, were they also seeking a feeling of calm while riding a sea of chaos?

My biopsy is likely to take place next week (it hasn’t yet been scheduled, I am waiting for my docs to converse about my case).  I have to partially wean Baby M from that side so as to avoid some complications, but after a few days, he should be back nursing on both sides.  I hate to leave a story unfinished, but I promise to keep you posted.

I am linking this up to the Celebrate Color event at Stitched in Color.  I think the colors are perfect for fall, plus, it feels good to feel that connection to other women who have all been stitching away this past month.  I wonder if any of them has a story similar to mine?  While I hope not, I imagine that, in all likelihood, some of them were also easing their worries with each and every stitch.

******************UPDATE**********************

So, the great news is that my biopsy came back as totally fine.  I have an enflamed galactocele, which is essentially a permanent plugged duct.  It has no health risks and will go away once I am done nursing.  Huge sigh of relief!

*And, as if life needed to get any more ironic, I just learned that October is, you guessed it, National Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

We spent all day Saturday prepping for the storm.  We picked up every loose toy/farm implement from the yard, contained all the animals, moved some of them to safer spots, and topped up all their food and water.  Inside, we cleaned the house from top to bottom, did all the laundry, located all the lights, batteries, radio, chargers, etc.  I condensed our big and small chest freezers into the large freezer and moved a bunch of food from our regular fridge into the one in the garage.  We filled a 50 gallon drum with water on our back porch.  I cooked some foods to eat, we were TOTALLY ready.

We lost power around 5:30am on Sunday.  We spent the morning playing with the kids and watching the fury rage outside while listening to the radio.  We heard and saw several branches fall and the wind whip all of our trees (we were getting 40-50 mph sustained gusts).  We played and sang and worried.  It started to become really clear that day that power would be out for quite some time, maybe up to a week.

The storm died down by the late afternoon and we decided the best plan of action would be to take our small chest freezer to my parents who lived about an hour away and still had power.  It could freeze overnight, and then we would move the choice cuts over.  It took five re-routes to make it to their place, there were so many downed trees.  When we were a minute away my dad called to say their power went out, but luckily it was restored within a few hours.

Monday morning we packed the meat into a cooler and left behind anything that could be turned into stock or soup and pressure canned.  We moved the frozen meat to my parent’s and tried to get some dry ice with no luck.  We got some large ice blocks which helped.  We were doing okay, we have a gas stove and grill so were able to cook and had plenty of drinking water plus water for dishes, flushing, the animals.  We ran our phone and iPod chargers while in the car, and we played a lot with the kids.

Tuesday Mike had to go to NYC for work and I went and spent the day at a friend’s house who had power.  It was a welcome respite.  However, I had to stop at ten gas stations to be able to fill up my car which was a bit nerve wracking.

Wednesday brought us back to town for a pedi visit for Miss C.  A very good friend offered to do our laundry and as luck would have it, her next door neighbor had a generator that was not being used as they had power in town.  We were able to borrow it in exchange for a selection of our meat plus the head and stomach of a goat.  Awesome to be able to deliver such a unique request.  We also were able to get our hands on some dry ice for ourselves and friends, just in case.  The generator was great and it felt so good to have power back to our chest freezer and outside fridge.  We had some problems getting the water running, Mike had to get a special adapter, which of course was sold out EVERYWHERE, but he was able to make one that worked.

Thursday morning we woke up with no power, but a working generator and a fridge and freezer that were cold.  It was the first day we didn’t have to act like chickens with our heads cut off and we spent the day playing with friends and relaxing at home.  I had lined up a bunch of hand-work projects and had been spinning and sewing little fabric hexagons at every opportunity.  We started cleaning up the debris and just enjoyed the sunshine.

Friday was a blur of trying to get the house back together and adjust to everything.  My brother and sister flew in for a visit that had been planned earlier in the summer and it was going to be difficult to have our visit with no power, but we were willing to make the best of it.  Luckily, 12 hours shy of one week, our power came back on.  We had just gotten back home from a long hike and it was so surreal to have it back.

It was not the worst thing in the world to be without power.  It was pretty horrible, though, to be running around so much trying to get ice and power for the fridge and freezer.  So, now we have a generator.  We might never need it again, but now we are ready.  We count ourselves among the lucky, things can always be worse.  Entire farms in Vermont were washed away, for example.

Wishing you are yours sunny skies.